Can I survive the menopause without going crazy?

Can I survive the menopause without going crazy?

I never gave this a second thought. Then it hit me, I am in my late forties, in a constant state of continuous denial, that in a few years, I will be slamming headlong into a seriously big milestone, one I want to forget.  A milestone that screams: “You are getting old!” And slowly it’s dawning on me that the menopause will be the next big thing to hit my life. And I am wondering if I can survive the menopause without going crazy?

Can I survive the menopause without going crazy?

Menopause…. I’m not old enough!

I still think I am 25. But I’m not.

I’m getting slower, I ache a little more, and I am getting just a little more forgetful.  Apparently, the menopause can start between the ages of 45 and 55, and I’m well within that age range.

I can run but I can’t hide….the menopause is coming

Symptoms of the menopause can start a few months or a few years before it really does hit. They call this the perimenopause phase. The female body is a bitch.

This is not fair. I could be stuck in the menopausal departure lounge for a few years. This means the perimenopause could have already started. OMG and am so not ready for this!

The menopause, what should I look out for?

Memory loss

The actress Gillian Anderson and journalist Jennifer Nadel have written a brilliant article about this hot topic in Lenny Letter.

She talks about memory loss or the ‘menopause brain’.

I  have yet get out of mummy brain mode, and now I find out I’m going into menopause brain – there is no escape.

I’m already, dare I say it, having moments:

  • Like the time I set the parental controls on Wonder Boy’s tablet, only to promptly forget the password and now we can’t reset it. He’s booted out a 8 pm and can’t download any games
  • I walk into a room and completely forget why I am there (hoping that’s totally normal)
  • I’m alway losing my keys. I can never remember where I have left them (please tell me I’m just disorganised)
  • I’m constantly thinking I need to be doing something, but I can’t remember what or why (tell me all I need is a sodding to-list)

And then there are:

  • hot flushes –I will be rosy-cheeked, hot and sweaty
  • night sweats – better buy some Egyptian cotton sheets and cute cotton pyjamas
  • difficulty sleeping – I’ll be loading up the kindle
  • a reduced sex drive – Noooooooo!
  • pain, itching or discomfort during sex – ouch!
  • headaches – pop another paracetamol
  • mood changes, such as low mood or anxiety – is that any different from PMS. I’m already a moody cow!
  • palpitations – oh really for who?
  • joint stiffness, aches and pains – oh blimey I’m already a bit stiff in the mornings
  • reduced muscle mass – what? Spindly legs and osteoporosis?
  • recurrent urinary tract infections (UTIs), such as cystitis – I’m bulk buying cranberry juice now
  • eventually, my periods will stop –  bring it on!

The menopause and menstruation, a perfect storm is brewing

I came to motherhood late. As my oestrogen levels start falling, Wonder Girl’s hormone levels will start surging.  I can guarantee we will drive each other crazy! The boys in our house (including the dog) had better run for cover.

No doubt there will be raging arguments! Tears, tantrums, slamming doors (and that’s just from me). Just getting it out there now. The boys have been warned!

Menopause, pah! I’m not going down without a fight

I am clinging on to the foundations of my youth, and I am ready to fight!

I’m not talking botox, nipping, tucking, stretching, pumping or peeling.

Nope, I’ve signed up for a half marathon, next March.

Running is again going to have to come to my rescue again. There’s plenty of time to train and I promise to keep you posted!

But seriously, it’s real and it’s going to happen to me

I’m glad women are coming out to talk about this phase in our lives.

If it hasn’t already started for me, it soon will. If you think you might be experiencing the menopause here are a few books and articles that might help.

The Hot Topic – Christa D’Souza

In Your Prime – India Knight

The Truth Is Out There (About The Menopause) – Gillian Anderson and Jennifer Nadel

Kirsty Wark: The Menopause And Me (BBC iPlayer)

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  1. January 14, 2018 / 8:52 pm

    I am right there with you on so much of this, although I passed that threshold in September and am in full-blown menopause at the age of 47. It’s WHY I started my new blog. Nobody talks about this s**t! And I had some pretty horrible symptoms that I didn’t know were menopause related that I had to try to figure out how to deal with. And like you, my daughter should be starting her period soon. I actually joked with her one time, “Well Mommy’s period is ending, that means yours can begin now.” She thought I was for real. LOL It should be any time, though. Several of her friends already have their’s. . .. . . and then the cycle begins again!

    • Tooting Mama
      January 14, 2018 / 9:05 pm

      Wow! At 47, that’s so young! I hope you are looking after yourself and taking lots of care and not going too crazy!

  2. June 7, 2017 / 12:21 am

    Oh my dear! These symptoms seem horrendous, sorry you have to be going through this. It only gets better. Beautifully written though.

    • Tooting Mama
      June 11, 2017 / 4:58 pm

      Yes not great at all!

  3. Hannah Jane
    June 3, 2017 / 10:22 pm

    This isn’t something I’ve put much thought into yet but actually probably something worth researching prior to the time! Theres definitely a few things you mentioned here that I didn’t know about!! Thank you for sharing with the #bigpinklink x
    Hannah Jane recently posted…What My Kid Wore Wednesday #12My Profile

    • Tooting Mama
      June 7, 2017 / 2:51 pm

      I never gave it much thought and here I am right up against it, it’s funny how it just creeps and bang it’s there!

  4. May 28, 2017 / 11:09 am

    Hi my dear I have written a lot about the menopause and how it has affected me on my blog. I have just turned 50 but I really started to notice the changes a couple of years ago. Exercise and a good diet is essential but also recently I have started taking bio-identical hormone therapy and it has been an absolute godsend. Everyone’s symptoms are different but I can’t recommend it highly enough.

    • Tooting Mama
      May 28, 2017 / 6:14 pm

      Ahhh thank you! Exercise has got me through so much and I absolutely agree about the diet. I shall investigate bio-identical hormone therapy.

  5. May 27, 2017 / 6:05 am

    I haven’t thought about it that much as I’m only 32 but I’ve lived through it with my mum and it’s not pretty so I think I’ll live in blissful ignorance for now ? #KCACOLS

    • Tooting Mama
      May 27, 2017 / 4:59 pm

      I shall envy your blissful ignorance – enjoy while you have it!

  6. May 26, 2017 / 10:13 am

    I’m in my 30s, so haven’t given the menopause that much thought yet to be honest, but I love that you’re putting this out there, it’s a topic that we should be talking openly about. It’s not something I’m looking forward to, I have to admit, my hormones have always been a bit all over the place as it is! x #KCACOLS

    • Tooting Mama
      May 27, 2017 / 5:00 pm

      I thought it was time there was a conversation on the topic, let’s face it, it’s happening to us all. Why suffer in silence?!

  7. May 26, 2017 / 9:07 am

    I am dreading menopause. I’m not even 40 but still dreading it too. I already have the memory loss. Yesterday I had to get 3 more house keys cut as yet again I forgot to take my keys out with me! I literally have mo idea what I am doing most days. So after reading this I like to think I’m not alone. Great post.
    Thanks so much for linking up at #KCACOLS. Hope you come back again next time.
    Tracey Bowden recently posted…Redecorating the Front Room? Get the Best Price with these TipsMy Profile

    • Tooting Mama
      May 27, 2017 / 5:01 pm

      You and me both. Wow, three keys cut! That’s mummy brain in full force!

  8. May 26, 2017 / 8:21 am

    This made me smile 🙂 . A couple of years ago I met up with a friend I hadn’t seen for a while and she asked me if I kept walking into rooms and forgetting what for, etc. We had a good laugh about it, but I noticed a lady on another table tuning in. She was with her husband and her body language told me she hadn’t been having a great time, poor thing. Many of my friends haven’t either, so I wasn’t looking forward to it.

    That said, I’ve been as right as rain. I do my yoga every day, cycle and swim a lot, eat well and keep busy. I use hrt patches though as I want to maintain the oestrogen – one side effect seems to be larger assets! My clothes still fit, but I’ve filled out on top. Yikes!!

    And yes, absolutely. I can’t be 51 – I was only 26 last birthday!

    • Tooting Mama
      May 27, 2017 / 5:03 pm

      Bigger assets??!!I don’t need mine any bigger! Thank you so much for your comment, so reassuring!

  9. May 26, 2017 / 5:26 am

    I agree Menopause isn’t something that is often talked about. I guess it isn’t an enjoyable experience but something will must all go through at some point. Good luck!
    Esthy recently posted…How to Help Your Child Choose a CareerMy Profile

    • Tooting Mama
      May 27, 2017 / 5:05 pm

      It’s not enjoyable and it’s to do with getting old, and that’s just a little bit taboo, as let’s face it as women we’re not allowed to be old. But hey! I am making stand. Thanks for your comment.

    • Tooting Mama
      May 27, 2017 / 5:08 pm

      Oh, sweetheart, I am giving you a really big hug. All this is hard enough and with caring on top of that. Lot’s of love and hugs my lovely. You are a truly amazing woman.

  10. May 25, 2017 / 3:14 pm

    I remember my mum going thru all this, it can’t be my time creeping up all ready…it comes too soon!!! #kcacols

    • Tooting Mama
      May 25, 2017 / 4:50 pm

      Yes! It sure does creep up! I can’t believe I have reached this time in life. Why didn’t anyone warn me!

  11. May 25, 2017 / 11:56 am

    You are in good company. All us hot mamas can do is embrace – a bit like we have embraced everything else that has been chucked at our hormones. I also have the puberty and peri-menopause residing in the same house. Always a great topic and we can still be 25 year olds at heart whilst going through all of this grown up stuff – can’t we? #KCACOLS

    • Tooting Mama
      May 25, 2017 / 4:51 pm

      You are right, embrace the change!

    • Tooting Mama
      May 25, 2017 / 4:51 pm

      Thank you. It’s just not fair! Can’t believe this is where I am, it’s all happened so fast!

  12. May 24, 2017 / 7:55 pm

    Oh Noooooo! I am 45 and dread all this. I just can’t be in my forties – I still feel 20 inside! Kaz

  13. May 24, 2017 / 4:37 am

    My mum started hers only a few years back when she turned 50 and it sucker punched her she said but managing it just fine now lol. Good luck to us all, its coming for sure
    Anosa recently posted…Recap on Lunch at Mango Tree {Harrods} My Profile

  14. May 23, 2017 / 8:41 pm

    My aunty went through menopause early after beating cancer and she said that forgetting things is quite normal. I like your fighters attitude and another great post from you x
    Ana De- Jesus recently posted…10 Things That Make Me HappyMy Profile

    • Tooting Mama
      May 23, 2017 / 10:41 pm

      Ahh thank you – fighting this all the way!

  15. May 23, 2017 / 8:21 pm

    I haven’t really thought about it, but I’m hanging on to the 30’s and stopping there! Haha I refuse to get older or grow up for that matter, although the absence of periods does sound quite inviting 🙂 x

    • Tooting Mama
      May 23, 2017 / 10:42 pm

      I’m clinging on to my 40s! My periods stopping is the only bit I am looking forward to!

  16. May 23, 2017 / 6:16 pm

    Good luck with it. I thought my mum went nuts when she had her hysterectomy and started the HRT but I realise that she’s always been like that… #kcacols
    Bread recently posted…Mental Health Moments Link UpMy Profile

    • Tooting Mama
      May 23, 2017 / 10:43 pm

      Well my husband would say he wouldn’t notice any different. Crazy it is then!

  17. May 23, 2017 / 11:58 am

    I’m the rollercoaster to menopause and I don’t really know too much about it apart from my mum moaning about the hot flushes. I hope that I am the later part of the age range! Thank you for joining us at #SharingtheBlogLove

    • Tooting Mama
      May 23, 2017 / 12:15 pm

      Me too, but I reckon it’s on its way pretty soon. Reading up on it, it all sounds a bit rubbish till I get to the no periods bit!

  18. May 23, 2017 / 9:16 am

    As I’m still in my twenties I haven’t really thought about menopause before although I have seen my mum starting to go through it and it is a pretty scary thought x

    • Tooting Mama
      May 23, 2017 / 12:16 pm

      Give her a big hug from me…..I’m not looking forward to at all, but maybe it gives me license for a tantrum or two!

  19. May 23, 2017 / 8:23 am

    I love your writing style! I’ve still got a few years to go until I need to deal with menopause, but it’s not something that’s written or talked about much so it’s good to have posts like this.

    • Tooting Mama
      May 23, 2017 / 12:19 pm

      Aww thank you! You are right, no one talks about it, and it’s a total mystery that we launch headlong into, doesn’t seem right!

  20. May 20, 2017 / 7:47 pm

    Maybe it’s that I’m that bit too young (although I’m 33, so not that young!), but I find that the menopause is something that’s not really talked about at all. I have to admit that I really don’t know much about it. It sounds all round pretty rubbish though (apart from the no periods thing!) – I’m already having problems with my memory too, so I can’t imagine things getting worse on that front! Best of luck with it when it comes – it sounds like you have a plan! I find running helps with so many aspects of life – a half marathon sounds like a perfect challenge! Thanks for joining us at #SharingtheBlogLove

    • Tooting Mama
      May 22, 2017 / 12:29 pm

      33, you baby!

      The menopause does sound pretty rubbish, but I have to ride this out. Hoping the running plan works out, and I’ll treat myself to some new clothes!

  21. May 20, 2017 / 7:05 am

    I’m this year. I feel
    Your pain. I was handling the forgetting the keys/ why am I in this room situations. Even the embarrassment of making phone calls and forgetting who I’ve dialled in the time it takes for my mystery guest to pick up. I’m coping with the too hot/ too cold, bra and knickers/ thick wooly onesie issues. But palpitations!!! OMG!!! WTF!!! Thought I was dying or at least having panic attacks….
    …on the plus side, sex life still fine ?

    • Tooting Mama
      May 22, 2017 / 12:32 pm

      Aww thank you! I haven’t done the mystery phone call yet but it’s only time! I tell you I really have no idea what to expect, no-one talks about this subject, it’s crazy as all women have to go through this!

  22. May 20, 2017 / 6:16 am

    That was cute. Love your writing style – funny and honest. As far as I know, menopause is unpleasant indeed. But so are other periods of a woman’s life. Look at the good side of things, your kids will have grown up so it will be your time to have fun and relax (hopefully). 😀 xx #SharingtheBlogLove
    Marina Ilieva recently posted…Mummy on a Saturday MorningMy Profile

    • Tooting Mama
      May 22, 2017 / 12:34 pm

      I love that you love my writing, thank you! I just wanted to shed a little light on this topic without being too morose. You are right though my kids will be growing up, and hopefully plenty of time for fun, so long as I have the energy!

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