I never gave this a second thought. Then it hit me, I am in my late forties, in a constant state of continuous denial, that in a few years, I will be slamming headlong into a seriously big milestone, one I want to forget. A milestone that screams: “You are getting old!” And slowly it’s dawning on me that the menopause will be the next big thing to hit my life. And I am wondering if I can survive the menopause without going crazy?
Can I survive the menopause without going crazy?
Menopause…. I’m not old enough!
I still think I am 25. But I’m not.
I’m getting slower, I ache a little more, and I am getting just a little more forgetful. Apparently, the menopause can start between the ages of 45 and 55, and I’m well within that age range.
I can run but I can’t hide….the menopause is coming
Symptoms of the menopause can start a few months or a few years before it really does hit. They call this the perimenopause phase. The female body is a bitch.
This is not fair. I could be stuck in the menopausal departure lounge for a few years. This means the perimenopause could have already started. OMG and am so not ready for this!
The menopause, what should I look out for?
The actress Gillian Anderson and journalist Jennifer Nadel have written a brilliant article about this hot topic in Lenny Letter.
She talks about memory loss or the ‘menopause brain’.
I have yet get out of mummy brain mode, and now I find out I’m going into menopause brain – there is no escape.
I’m already, dare I say it, having moments:
- Like the time I set the parental controls on Wonder Boy’s tablet, only to promptly forget the password and now we can’t reset it. He’s booted out a 8 pm and can’t download any games
- I walk into a room and completely forget why I am there (hoping that’s totally normal)
- I’m alway losing my keys. I can never remember where I have left them (please tell me I’m just disorganised)
- I’m constantly thinking I need to be doing something, but I can’t remember what or why (tell me all I need is a sodding to-list)
And then there are:
- hot flushes –I will be rosy-cheeked, hot and sweaty
- night sweats – better buy some Egyptian cotton sheets and cute cotton pyjamas
- difficulty sleeping – I’ll be loading up the kindle
- a reduced sex drive – Noooooooo!
- pain, itching or discomfort during sex – ouch!
- headaches – pop another paracetamol
- mood changes, such as low mood or anxiety – is that any different from PMS. I’m already a moody cow!
- palpitations – oh really for who?
- joint stiffness, aches and pains – oh blimey I’m already a bit stiff in the mornings
- reduced muscle mass – what? Spindly legs and osteoporosis?
- recurrent urinary tract infections (UTIs), such as cystitis – I’m bulk buying cranberry juice now
- eventually, my periods will stop – bring it on!
The menopause and menstruation, a perfect storm is brewing
I came to motherhood late. As my oestrogen levels start falling, Wonder Girl’s hormone levels will start surging. I can guarantee we will drive each other crazy! The boys in our house (including the dog) had better run for cover.
No doubt there will be raging arguments! Tears, tantrums, slamming doors (and that’s just from me). Just getting it out there now. The boys have been warned!
Menopause, pah! I’m not going down without a fight
I am clinging on to the foundations of my youth, and I am ready to fight!
I’m not talking botox, nipping, tucking, stretching, pumping or peeling.
Nope, I’ve signed up for a half marathon, next March.
Running is again going to have to come to my rescue again. There’s plenty of time to train and I promise to keep you posted!
But seriously, it’s real and it’s going to happen to me
I’m glad women are coming out to talk about this phase in our lives.
If it hasn’t already started for me, it soon will. If you think you might be experiencing the menopause here are a few books and articles that might help.
The Hot Topic – Christa D’Souza
In Your Prime – India Knight
The Truth Is Out There (About The Menopause) – Gillian Anderson and Jennifer Nadel
Kirsty Wark: The Menopause And Me (BBC iPlayer)
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